I am often asked about “Wife Deafness”. It is probably more common than any other kind of “partner deafness” because women’s voices have acoustic characteristics that are harder to hear in background noise, and by people experiencing high frequency hearing loss.

As we spend longer and longer in domestic bliss, we also tend to get lazier with our communication. The sad fact is that, at the same time, our ability to hear and listen is probably deteriorating. Rule one for avoiding the phenomenon of “partner deafness” is to speak to each other whilst facing each other, in the same room. Does this sound like an effort? Try it – it’s a genius solution.

This isn’t always possible. What about in the car? Wife wants to stop at yummy looking produce store, and says so, but not too insistently. Husband, driving and concentrating, doesn’t hear soon enough. He could hear wife, but it took a while to sink in as he has mild hearing difficulties and would have had to look at you and focus on listening to absorb the message. Too late. This is the point where one partner says, when they are next home “You should get hearing aids”.  So, maybe you just hop on line and get Blamey Saunders Hears hearing aids, or maybe you go for a hearing test. If you go for a hearing test, because you have hearing difficulties, make sure that a proper evaluation is done. Has the audiologist answered your question as to why you have hearing difficulties? Have they tested your hearing in background noise?

I suspect there are marriages threatened when a partner comes back from a screening audiogram with the triumphal words “I passed”. The audiogram is a fairly crude test of hearing ability, originally designed to test hearing of returning servicemen after WWII, and has been translated into a prescription or otherwise, for hearing aids. However, if you have difficulties hearing, you  are unlikely to be imagining it, and you need a solution for good quality of life, so don’t ignore it. The chances are that you have gradually lost high frequency sensitivity, and that hearing in noise has become tricky. Get good, open fit hearing aids, with good frequency range and good adaptive directional microphones, as soon as possible, if this is you.  Get ones that sound natural at this early stage of hearing loss.

Researchers have shown that the most sensitive test of hearing ability is to ask yourself, absolutely honestly, perhaps as part of a discussion with your family, friends or colleagues, if you ever have difficulty hearing. If you do, then high quality hearing aids will probably help – but if you go to an audiologist, then find out why you are having difficulty.

Don’t settle for a vague answer.